Sunday morning

Last Sunday after church I thought about how much I would miss church while we are gone.  We really love our church and never fail to walk away feeling revived spiritually and emotionally.  We are new members, yet the people there have welcomed us with loving arms and given us incredible support throughout this adoption.  This is not our first adoption, but it is the first time we have received so much support throughout the process.  Six months ago we were strangers to the people at our church, but now we are family.  This morning we especially miss our church family!  I found it so amazing that when I was giving Malachi a shower this morning he asked me, "Do they have church in China?"  We had not told him it was church day, but his spirit must have felt the same void mine feels this morning knowing we will miss going to church and having fellowship with our great friends.  It does make it feel better to know Christina will be able to go to church and that she is staying with a wonderful family from our church so we still have that connection to our church family.

We are now headed to breakfast and will go touring Beijing after that.  Spokoynoy nochi to our Siberian princess!

We are in Beijing!

We made it safely to Beijing and we are now in our hotel room. It is 3:00am Sunday morning so we are going to bed. We greatly appreciate all the prayers as we had a VERY smooth trip. There were no delays anywhere along the way. I had no motion sickness, which is practically a miracle (when we flew to India 2 years ago to get Malachi I got extremely sick, sick enough to go through more than a few air sickness bags). The flight from Seattle to Beijing was half-empty (at least) so we ended up with plenty of room to spread out and be more comfortable. Caleb is not better but he has not gotten worse so that is very good. He slept during more than half of the ~5 hours we were on the plane to Seattle, and both boys got a lot of sleep on the flight to Beijing. Now it is time for us parents to hopefully get a few hours of sleep! Love to all, especially our dear Christina!

On our way!

Our first 2 flights are done and we are now in Seattle awaiting our flight to Beijing.  Caleb is really sick but hanging in there.  Please pray he starts getting better and not worse.  Christina says she is sick too, but she is thankfully in wonderful hands so we aren't worried.

I know a lot of people are interested in our itinerary, so here it is.

Friday morning - departure from hometown airport, fly to Atlanta, fly to Seattle, fly to Beijing

Saturday night / early Sunday morning arrival in Beijing

Sunday, Monday, Tuesday (August 29-31) - tour Beijing, meet with agency staff

Wednesday (September 1) - fly to Guiyang in Guizhou province

Thursday, Friday, Saturday (September 2 - 4) - tour Guizhou province

Sunday (September 5) - MICAELYN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Monday (September 6) - officially become parents to our precious little girl!

Tuesday (September 7) - file for Micaelyn's passport

Wednesday (September 8) - fly to Guangzhou, meet JOSHUA and officially adopt him (we will meet him and complete the adoption on the same day in order to get the adoption registered before his birthday)

Sunday (September 12) - Joshua's 14th birthday, his first birthday to celebrate as a beloved son!

Tuesday (September 14) - Consulate appointment

Thursday (September 16) - pick up visa, free to leave Guangzhou, take overnight train to Guilin

Friday (September 17) - Li River cruise in Guilin

Saturday (September 18) - tour Guilin, take overnight train to border of China/Hong Kong

Sunday (September 19) - explore Hong Kong

Monday (September 20) - fly from Hong Kong to Detroit

Tuesday (September 21) - fly HOME!!!!!

Our total time gone will be 3 1/2 weeks.  Since most adoption require you to spend a week in your child's province before going on to Guangzhou we thought we would have to be in Micaelyn's province for nearly a week, and since adoptions from Guangzhou take 2 weeks we thought we would have to spend 2 weeks there making the total trip 3 weeks plus the time in Beijing (most adoption agencies have you start out in Beijing).  Thus when we started planning our trip around Joshua's birthday before we even had travel approval we based it on this timeline of being gone for 3 1/2 weeks.  As it turned out the officials in both places decided to move us through a little faster so we could have done the trip in 2 1/2 weeks, but since we had already planned the dates we would arrive in and depart from China we kept it at that.  Thus even though we will leave Guiyang within just a few days of getting Micaelyn we will still stay there a week getting to know the area she is from.  There is a story about why this is important to us, but it will have to wait until after we return home.  However, it does make a really good "Red Thread" story!

Supposedly we should be able to leave by Friday, September 17, but our agency told us to stay in China a few more days in case things don't get rushed through as they are supposed to.  Since we will be tired of staying in Guangzhou by that point we figured the overnight trains would be a good way to see another part of China without spending a lot of extra money (and since the trains are overnight that means 2 nights less of having to pay for 2 hotel rooms).

I am very excited about going to China, even more excited about getting my children, but I'm already eager to get home.  I can't wait to get home and get my house cleaned up, do the laundry (because I know I will have A LOT), and get settled into home life with ALL my children under 1 roof.

Leaving tomorrow!

Just a short break from the madness of packing to say we leave tomorrow morning!  Hopefully I will get to blog during our layovers and can post our itinerary.  Please pray there are no delays, especially on our first flight as our layover in Atlanta is pretty short.  Also, please pray for good health.  We've all been feeling less than 100% (probably due to stress), but Caleb in particular seems to be taking a turn downhill.  He has been fairly congested today, coughing, runny nose, etc.

By the way, we hopefully will be able to blog via a VPN while in China (blogspot is blocked in China and can't be accessed there), but if that fails for some reason we will blog via our babyjellybeans account.  The link is posted on the right hand side (underneath all the kids' pictures) as "our original family website." 

New pictures of Joshua

For whatever reason we haven't been able to get many pictures of Joshua, not even when we sent the care package through Ann at Red Thread. We did finally get one last week, and another family that recently traveled received a picture of him with his friends who are also being adopted through the Journey of Hope program. I can't help but notice Joshua is wearing the same clothes in both pictures, but the pictures were not taken on the same day. Also, his friend (the boy on the right side of the group photo) is wearing the same shorts and sandals as him. This was something we noticed with some of the pictures of Christina and her friends when she lived in the orphanage. It seems the orphanages often end up with many of the same clothes, and the kids just have to wear whatever is available. Can you imagine how much harder this makes things for the orphans who go to school with kids who have families? It will be so nice to finally give Joshua plenty of nice clothes to wear.

New pictures of Micaelyn

After asking numerous times over the last year for current pictures I finally have some! We received the last pictures of Micaelyn from the orphanage back in February, but they were actually taken last September, nearly a year ago. Needless to say I'm not only happy to have gotten more pictures, I'm also happy the pictures were actually current this time. We were so very happy to see her smiling in these pictures!

I just love the last picture of her with her mouth closed. Due to her enlarged tongue her mouth has been open in almost all the pictures we have received of her. It's nice to get a glimpse of how cute and spunky she looks when she holds her lips together.  Needless to say, I cropped it to show off her sweet little face!

Also on a positive note, the geneticist has agreed to work Micaelyn in soon after we get her home even though it normally takes several months to get an appointment. Due to the fact she should be receiving blood work every 6 weeks and ultrasounds every 12 weeks to screen for tumors it is of utmost importance she be seen right away. She hasn't been receiving any screening in China, so we have had to rely solely on faith that her little body is staying healthy and tumor free. It was also wonderful to hear the geneticist has had experience with Beckwith-Wiedemann syndrome patients. Given it's a rather rare syndrome many families deal with doctors who have no experience with BWS. We feel fortunate to have access to such good medical care for Micaelyn.

Language troubles...

Christina has been home 4 1/2 years. She now knows a lot of English, but she still occasionally asks what a word means and uses a dictionary much more often than most 17 year olds (and we're proud of her for using the dictionary!). So the other night when she was given an assignment in her Bible class to read in Genesis about Abraham it was not surprising she came across a word she didn't know. Unfortunately, instead of asking me or looking it up in the dictionary she showed up in her Bible class the next day asking everyone (very seriously), "What does circumcision mean?" She said she didn't understand why everyone was laughing so hard. Oh, the joys of learning a new language as a teenager!

Since I didn't have the blog back when we brought Christina home, here are a few pictures of her from her first months home with us. It's hard to believe she grew so much so quickly, but she is still just as beautiful as ever!

Micaelyn and Joshua, Here we come!!!

After looking at my precious daughter's picture for over a year now KNOWING she was my daughter (and for many months before I knew she was my daughter I had been looking at her sweet picture on a couple of photolistings praying for her to find a family) I can finally say we leave NEXT WEEK to bring her home. It seems almost surreal after waiting so long, but in the miracle God has woven for us we will not only be bringing home our little girl we will also be bringing home a 14 year old son! Micaelyn and Joshua, we'll be there soon to bring you HOME!

All the Difference

Like cold water to a weary soul is good news from a distant land. -Proverbs 25:25
We recently received a letter from Joshua. Here it is:

Dear mom and dad,
How are you?
I am glad that you choose me to your family member. Thank you for your gifts that you sent to me. I share and play with them with my close friends.
My best friend is Guang Huang Zheng. He is very kind to me. When I have trouble in doing my homework, he will not tell me the right answer directly, instead he will teach me the ways to analyzing the problem. What’s more, he tells me, “You should not only look for the answers when you suffer trouble in studies, but also look for the way to solve such kinds of problem. Doing this, you won’t be wrong again.” So I share with him first since I have something good to eat and play with now, and then I share with other friends. Finally can you send me some shampoo?
Hope you all to be healthy and happy everyday. I will be waiting for you to come to meet me. I love you very much.
Hai Hua
Jul.30th, 2010

Getting the care package we sent to him caused a bit of a mess, but at least in the end he did receive the things we sent him. We sent him a few small toys, clothes, 20 candy bars (so he could share), toothbrush/toothpaste, a backpack, some pens, a journal, and some pictures.

It was extremely hard for me to read Joshua's request for shampoo. Here is a teenage boy who has for the first time in his life parents to ask for things from, and the one thing he asks for is shampoo. It didn't really shock me, after all I have heard all the stories about how terrible Christina's life was at her orphanage in Siberia and the things she didn't have there. However, even when it's not surprising, it's still agonizing to read that your own son doesn't have even the most basic necessities of life. I think often of the kids at Christina's orphanage in Siberia that begged us to find families for them too. Sadly, most of those kids will never find families, and many will die before they are even 20 years old. Very, very few will ever live a "decent" life (and I put decent in quotes because the few that reach this level of success will still live a life that's far below the poverty level here in America, and they will still face many hardships and prejudices for having grown up as an orphan). Very few people understand why we have willingly chosen such a difficult path. Some of our own family completely disapprove of it. However, when shampoo is the most important thing a child can ask for, when children around the world beg for a family, when small children live by themselves on the street, you can do only 2 things about it - you can choose to forget it and continue living your life as if in complete ignorance of the desperate needs of so many children around the world or you can choose to do something to make a difference. One choice leads to the easy path, one choice leads to the more difficult path. We have chosen to do something about it, and while it may be the more difficult path it is also the more rewarding path, and more significantly it is the path we are called by Christ to take.

"Two roads diverged in a wood, and I, I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference." -Robert Frost's "The Road Not Taken" poem

The Starfish Story
Original Story by: Loren Eisley

One day a man was walking along the beach when he noticed
a boy picking something up and gently throwing it into the ocean.
Approaching the boy, he asked, “What are you doing?”
The youth replied, “Throwing starfish back into the ocean.
The surf is up and the tide is going out. If I don’t throw them back, they’ll die.”
“Son,” the man said, “don’t you realize there are miles and miles of beach and hundreds of starfish?
You can’t make a difference!”
After listening politely, the boy bent down, picked up another starfish,
and threw it back into the surf. Then, smiling at the man, he said…”
I made a difference for that one.”

Having fun with photos

I rarely take our kids to have their picture made anywhere. I'd love to be able to take them to a professional photographer, especially a really good one, at least once a year, but that's just one of the sacrifices we have made in order to deal with adoption expenses. However, I've really been wanting to get some good pictures of Christina (at 17 she has never had her portrait taken professionally aside from school pictures), and I really wanted to get some good pictures of the kids together (since I've never done that before) so a few weeks ago I took them to Sears. I know it's not the same as taking them to a true professional photographer (like this, one of my friends from high school who is truly an amazing photographer), but with the adoption expenses we are dealing with I'm just happy to have gotten any pictures at all! The best part about getting pictures done at Sears is the ability to purchase a cd of all the images. That way I can not only print up as many pictures as I want whenever I decide I want them, I can also have a lot of fun with the images. Here's a look at the fun I've had with these!


This is the original picture as it was taken. I didn't order any copies because I thought it just didn't look right. Not that my daughter isn't beautiful, just that the portrait could be better.


My first edit, straightened just a little, cropped, lightened, and with some minor touch-ups.


I wanted the focus to be just on her beautiful face.


By playing around on iPhoto I got the picture to look like a drawing. I really like this one a lot!


I think it also looks nice in black and white.


Another picture, truly a beautiful picture to start with.


I really love the way this turned out!


Showing off her face again - so beautiful!


Just as beautiful in black and white!


Another photo I edited just a bit.


All 3 together (I do wish the photographer had placed Malachi on the side with greater lighting instead of Caleb so he wouldn't blend into the background so much).


Another edited version.


I don't usually have time to do much editing on photos, and this was the first I really got to try out the new iPhoto program that came with the new computer (which we were forced to get when the motherboard on the other one died - I really didn't want to have to get a new computer!). Now I can't help but wonder just what I could do with some of the software for editing photos, digital scrapbooking, etc. I'd also love to figure out how to totally redesign my blog with a much better header at the top that actually includes ALL my children. With the new computer I don't have a way to merge multiple pictures into one so I still haven't been able to get Joshua's picture up there. Unfortunately, I haven't a clue which would be the best programs to use and I don't want to waste any money on a program that isn't very good. I hope I figure out something soon!

Another senseless adoption comment

Most all of us who have adopted children at some point in time have had to deal with irritating, rude, and downright mean comments. It wasn't my first, and I'm sure it won't be my last, but tonight I got stung by yet another senseless comment. I don't think the person meant any ill will, but it really rubbed me the wrong way!

To set the story, last night Caleb went to Vacation Bible School at a church near our home, not our own church. When we went to pick him up his teachers saw Malachi and told us he could come tonight also. I made sure it was okay since he is a little younger, and the teachers said it was not a problem. So tonight when I went back to drop them off I told the lady at the registration table I needed to sign Malachi up also. She questioned me about his age and said since he was only 4 he was too young for the kindergarten class and he couldn't stay unless a parent stayed also. I told her he was about to turn 5, was old enough to start kindergarten this year, and that the teachers had explicitly told me he could come. She didn't seem convinced and started asking me very direct questions.

She asked,"Where do you live?" I'm not sure why that mattered, and I don't generally like telling strangers where I live. Given that this is a small community church it's very unlikely someone who is not a member of that church would drive very far just to take their kids to VBS since there are plenty of other churches doing VBS right now also. Thus she could have easily assumed I lived somewhere nearby, and of course she could have just looked at the address I wrote down on the registration sheet if she really needed to know.

Then she asked, "Do you go to church?" Well, I most certainly had no problem answering that, but I couldn't help but think if we didn't go to church anywhere how uncomfortable that question would make me. There are much better ways to find out if someone goes to church and invite them to your own!

Next question she asked was, "Are these your only 2 kids?" I started off by telling her, "No, we also have a 17 year old daughter." Of course, every time I tell people who see Caleb and Malachi that I also have a 17 year old daughter I can tell immediately what they start thinking - that I got pregnant when I was very young - and their mindset about me seems to take a negative direction. I really dislike the fact that unless I tell people how we adopted Christina when she was 12 they automatically draw negative conclusions about me. So then I told the lady about our 2 kids waiting in China and she questioned me further about our adoptions. Thus I told her how we had adopted Christina from Siberia 4 years ago and Malachi from India 2 years ago, at which point she told me, "Your husband must have a very good job."

Quite often when I tell people about all our adoptions they have very positive reactions, even saying things like, "How wonderful", "God bless you", "What special people you must be", etc. Although I don't expect such positive reactions and don't feel deserving of them (because we aren't adopting to get praise or even to "save a child" - we are adopting because we want to share our love with a child), I will admit I can deal with the positive comments much better than the negative ones (e.g. I usually mention how blessed we feel to have our children with us, that while others may see the sacrifices we have made we see only the blessings we have received), and it really caught me off guard to get a comment like this from a stranger at a church - those are usually the people who say the nicest things!

When we are right in the midst of an adoption that will take over $40,000, when I am dealing daily with the frustration of knowing we will probably have approval to travel in August or maybe even July but we really have no choice but to wait until the beginning of September to travel due to money issues, when we are working so hard to pay off the debt from our previous adoptions while still trying to fund this one, it is very irritating to have someone make the assumption that just because we are adopting these children we must have plenty of money to spare.

NO, NO, NO!!! We have made many, many sacrifices to bring home our children. We work hard to come up with the money. When we don't come up with the money in time we deal with the added burden of debt. While so many people urge being debt free and especially avoiding credit cards, we have dealt with the burden of unwanted credit card debt when we had no other choice for buying airline tickets or paying hotel and other travel expenses. We most certainly aren't wealthy, we have just chosen a different path for our lives and our money than most people choose. Personally, I can't help but feel the blessings we have received have been far, far greater than the sacrifices we have made!



Oh, and I do find it a little ironic this happened right after my last post in which I talked about just a few of the sacrifices we have made to be able to afford adoption. I get so tired of having people tell me, "Oh, I would love to adopt but we just can't afford it." If only more people understood the blessing is much greater than the sacrifices I think there would be fewer orphans in the world!

It's that time of year again...

...when for the 4th year in a row riding in our van is downright miserable due to the lack of air conditioning

...when I watch all the other neighbors zoom around the yard on their riding lawn mowers while I spend endless hours in the blazing hot sun and stifling humidity pushing a cheap little push mower up an incline and over the rough ground

...when we hear everybody else talking about their vacations to the beach, Disney World, and other neat places while our 6 year old son begs for the experience of staying in a hotel for "at least one night."

...when Vacation Bible School in the morning at our church gives me a chance to run errands and experience time without the kids for a couple of hours for 5 straight days, and I think about how much easier life must be for all the moms whose children go to Mother's Day Out each week at church (or any other part-time child care)

...when Vacation Bible School in the evening at the church around the corner from us gives my husband and I a couple of hours alone for a few days, and we spend the first day in a state of near shock at the concept of actually being ALONE together while imagining how fun life must be for those who can hire a sitter for their children

But then when I see this beautiful face...

...and I see this sweet smile...

...when I think of this precious boy...

...and this sweet little girl...

I have no regrets about how we have chosen to spend our money, and then...

...I am thankful for the old cars we have that are paid off, even if it means driving with no air conditioning, and even if the cars need some work. After all, it's pretty neat to think we are still using my very first vehicle, the truck I bought when I was still a teenager!

...I am thankful for the big yard we have that needs to be mowed and for having a little push-mower to mow it with, for the nice neighbor who fixed the mower so I'm not pushing around a half-broken mower anymore, and for the green grass and weeds that grow in the yard (because in Florida we had too much sand in our yard to grow anything).

...I am thankful that although we don't get to take neat vacations we live in a place that's so nice people come here from all over America for their vacations, and before that we spent many years living in another popular vacation destination along the Gulf Coast of Florida. I'm also thankful for the opportunity to travel around the world to bring home my precious children, and while we've never taken a luxurious vacation personally I think what we have seen has been far more life-changing and rewarding. We have been to an orphanage in Siberia where children begged us to find families for them. We have seen indescribable poverty and depression, homeless mothers begging for help, starving children begging for food, young kids selling themselves in a desperate attempt at survival. We have seen the slums of India, we watched naked children eating from the same piles of garbage on the street corners from which the cows were eating. We have seen hundreds of families living on the streets, and we knew those kids were the lucky ones because at least they had parents to love them as opposed to the thousands and millions of unwanted orphans. In short, we have seen what most people here in America never will, and thus we know just how incredibly blessed be are.

...I am indescribably thankful for the children that are always with me instead of going to a Mother's Day Out program, that go everywhere I go and beg for everything in the store and then whine when they don't get it, that make running the simplest of errands a burdensome task. I rejoice in the fact that I am never alone, because it doesn't mean I have my hands full, it just means I have my heart full!

A new name

You will be called by a new name that the mouth of the LORD will bestow. - Isaiah 62:2

When we first felt called to adopt our new son in addition to our sweet daughter we had no idea what his Chinese name was (the agency wouldn't give us any information on him since we were already in process to adopt our daughter). Thus when we thought about what we would name him if we were miraculously given approval to adopt him we couldn't help but think about the name we had already planned for our next son. Therefore we always thought of him as "Christian" even when there seemed to be no hope of adopting him.

Once we learned his name, "Hua," we couldn't really think of any American names that were similar, and since Hua wasn't really a name that would fit in well here in America we decided to go with our plan of naming him Christian Isaiah.

A couple of weeks ago completely out of the blue it occurred to me that the name Joshua ends in "hua." After realizing that, it only made sense to change our new son's name to Joshua since it ends with his Chinese name.

Although it took several weeks to get used to the idea of a different name for him, we all like the name Joshua. It is a beautiful name with a very powerful meaning, especially given the miraculous story of Joshua's adoption that could only have been orchestrated through God.

The name Joshua means "God is my salvation." Another translation is "God rescues." People rarely adopt older children, and the vast majority of adoptive families choose to adopt girls instead of boys. Even healthy little boys wait simply because they are a boy, so as a teenage boy, especially one with congenital heart defects and pulmonary hypertension (a potentially life threatening condition that can lead to double heart/lung transplants), Joshua had virtually no hope of finding a family. At 13 time was rapidly running out for him given that on his 14th birthday he would no longer be eligible for adoption. We watched the photolistings for months in hopes this child would find a family since we knew our agency would never allow us to adopt him. Once we began the battle to get our agency's approval to adopt him we knew it would take an absolute miracle. Yes, it seems like common sense that we be allowed to adopt him, and yes, people adopt 2 kids all the time through other agencies. However, our agency NEVER, NEVER, NEVER allows this!

It took a huge battle, lots of effort, way too much time, and enormous faith, but ALL things are possible with God! God truly did rescue Joshua as without this miracle Joshua would have been condemned to life as an orphan in China. In a country where males his age greatly outnumber females and extended families are of great importance, without a family (and thus an inheritance) Joshua almost certainly would never have found a wife. Thus he would have lived his entire life as an orphan with no family - no parents, no grandparents, no wife, no children, etc. His life may have been severely shortened due to a lack of medical care for his pulmonary hypertension. He would never have been taught any kind of faith to help carry him through the trials of life, and he would probably have never learned about Jesus Christ. However, through a great miracle God rescued Joshua, and thus I don't think there could possibly be any name more appropriate for him than one that means "God rescues."

We will keep the middle name of Isaiah (which also means "God is my Salvation; the Lord saves me"). Given all the connections to that name (mentioned in this post) I think it too has great meaning, and Joshua Isaiah seems like a perfect fit

Our handsome little Indian prince!

To save money I take our passport/visa pictures myself. It can be hard to get a good picture of Malachi (not because he isn't adorable but rather because he has no ability to follow directions), but this one turned out so well I think I may blow it up and frame it!

Adding a little more to the story...

In order to get the last post done in time I didn't really write very much about my father for whom Micaelyn is named. Thus I'd like to add just a little more to the story.

I was very little when my parents were divorced, and my father always lived several hours away (at least) so I didn't really get to see much of him. When I was in late elementary school he was transferred to Tyndall Air Force Base in Panama City, FL (he wasn't active duty Air Force - he was in the Civil Service). At that point he lived 8 hours away, so I really only saw him a couple of times a year. However, when I was 20 years old I decided to move there for the whole summer to spend more time with him and also my little brothers who were 1 and 4 at the time. I got a full time job working in a hospital affiliated gym (because I was majoring in Exercise Science: Cardiopulmonary Rehabilitation, as well as Biology: Pre-med and Chemistry: Pre-med - and I managed to take home several Outstanding Senior awards for having the highest GPA in each of those 3 majors - Isn't it ironic that instead of becoming a doctor I ended up being a stay-at-home mom to a bunch of special needs kids? As I always say, God's plans are so much better than our own!).

Within my first few days in Florida my father invited me out to lunch with him and his coworker - a young Air Force officer. The two men worked side by side alone together in a locked vault all day long doing top-secret work for the Air Force. Throughout the summer I would occasionally see this young officer on other occasions. Sometimes he came by our house to hang out with my father and talk about things most people couldn't begin to understand. Not having much understanding of radar, missiles, drones, and all the high tech topics they were discussing, along with the fact that a lot of what they did was shrouded in secrecy, I didn't ever really hang around to get to know the young officer very well.

After summer was over I left Florida to go back to college. However, when Halloween rolled around I skipped a bunch of classes/labs/clinicals so I could go back to Florida and take my little brothers trick-or-treating (I had a professor complain about that, but I argued that nothing was more important to me than my family. I think if I wouldn't have been the top student I would have gotten myself in a bit of trouble for skipping!). While there the young AF officer invited me to a Halloween party with him. I told him I would be busy taking my brothers trick-or-treating, but he told me to just meet him there when I was done and promised to not dress up himself so I wouldn't feel out of place or not recognize him. So after I finished taking my brothers trick-or-treating I drove over to the party, but when I saw how many cars were there (A LOT!) I chickened out (I can be pretty shy!) and went home. Later he called me and said he was disappointed I didn't make it.

The following Memorial Day weekend (obviously quite a few months later) I headed back to Florida, and while at work my father told the officer I was headed down and casually mentioned how I would be bored while I was there. The officer said he had a new jet ski and told my dad he would take me out on it. How on earth could I turn that offer down? I might have been shy, but I was also adventurous and loved to have fun! :)

So one afternoon along with my father I met the young officer at an area called Bonita Bay right there on the Air Force base. I said good-bye to my dad and sailed off into the water with the man I would marry just 7 1/2 months later.

Almost a decade later just before Christmas of 2007 we went back to Bonita Bay to say a final good-bye to my father. He had died of a heart attack at 55 years of age, and the Air Force had arranged a ceremony on one of their boats to spread his ashes out at sea. We rode out in the bay, through the pass beyond Shell Island, just as my husband and I had done 10 years before on our first "date" together. A plane flew overhead in a final salute good-bye to my father. It was the plane my husband had spent so many hours/years working on doing airborne telemetry we affectionately called it "his" plane. At my husband's request, the Air Force presented each of my dad's 4 children with framed pictures signed by the members of his squadron (the same sort of going-away gift that is given when a member leaves the squadron either through retirement, transfer to a new base, or separation from the Air Force - my husband has several of these from his years in the Air Force).

The pain of losing my father will always be there, but I am ever so thankful that God orchestrated things the way He did! My father did a lot of really important and amazing work, but few people in this world will ever know or understand exactly what he did (and thus the reason I'm not going into any detail on that). God blessed me by leading me into marriage with the one man who best understood what my father did, a man who had the capacity to actually talk with my father like few others could and therefore became one of the few true friends my father ever really had, the man who fought for recognition for my father, a fight which subsequently led to my father receiving numerous awards and honors for his work. Because of this I will never have to wonder what my father really did. My children can learn about their granddad from the man who best knew him and his work, their own daddy. My father may be gone, but his work will be well remembered in our family!

During the time my husband was in the Air Force working with my father the squadron had carved a wooden plaque to hang above the door of the vault that read "Big Ern's Playhouse" (Big Ern was my husband's call sign). After my dad's death they took it down so they could make a new sign in memory of my father (I think the new sign was supposed to read "WolfMan's Den" since they called my father WolfMan). Only God could have known that from those two men working together in a locked vault doing top secret work for the military a man and woman would be married, the man would accept Christ into his heart as Lord and Savior of his life, a child would be born, and 4 orphans would become beloved sons and daughters (and that's just what has happened so far, only He knows how many kids are still waiting for us!).

The following two pictures were taken when Ernie was promoted to Captain (before we were married). He had already asked my father to pin-on his new rank before that time he took me out on the jet-ski, and when we started dating he figured I would be the perfect person to pin-on his rank on the other side. How cool is that?


The picture below is the one given to me by the Air Force during the ceremony out at sea (my 3 brothers each received one made specifically for them). Since my father could have retired earlier in the year (at his 55th birthday) for his 30 years in the Civil Service my husband requested these pictures be made for his children in place of the one that would have been given to him at retirement. It was signed by the members of his squadron - since the notes were written specific to me about my dad it is really special. The boats at the bottom of the picture are the ones used by the squadron in support of their missions, and the ceremony was held on one of those boats. The white plane in the picture is the one my husband worked on for so many years as a contractor after separating from the Air Force. Thus even though he was no longer in the Air Force he still worked on the base supporting his old squadron doing nearly the same job as a contractor instead of as an AF officer. The plaque at the bottom reads:
Gary "WOLFMAN" _______ (I don't list last names on here)
83d FWS Computer Engineer
(aka Mr. WSEP)
1989-2007

The following picture is the one that was given to my husband by the same squadron for his service to that unit. The plaque at the bottom reads:
CAPT ERNIE "BIGERN" ________
30 SEP 96 - 29 JUN 99
"Namesake of the PLAYHOUSE"
Remember I mentioned the wooden plaque that had hung above the door to the vault for over a decade that read "Big Ern's Playhouse."

This is a shot of the pictures hanging in our office along with some of my husband's other military things, many of which are related to his work for that same squadron. The collage hanging above the picture I received in honor of my father is one my husband received for his work as a contractor working on the E-9 (the white Air Force plane seen in the pictures). Unfortunately all the signatures are on the back of that picture so we have to take it off the wall to read them.

The next picture was taken during the ceremony as we were heading out of Bonita Bay (and it really is a "beautiful" bay!) towards the Gulf of Mexico. The land seen in the picture is Shell Island, a popular tourist destination in Panama City. This was the same route my husband and I had taken a decade before on our first outing together. I don't really have words to describe what it was like to take that same journey to bid my father a final farewell while remembering the time I had bid him a brief farewell before heading off on the "date" with his friend that would change my life forever.

Looking up from the boat.

A presentation to my granddad. As hard as it was for me to lose my dad, I felt worse for him. He buried his younger son from a heart attack at only 26 years of age. Then his older son died from a heart attack at 55 years of age. Those 2 sons (my dad and uncle) were his only kids, so in burying my dad he had outlived all his children (and also one grandchild).

The E-9, the white Air Force plane my husband spent so many years working on as a contractor (the same one seen in the picture given to me by the Air Force) flies over the boat.

God blessed us with truly perfect weather and indescribably gorgeous skies for the ceremony.











The sun cast its final light as I unwillingly forced myself to say good-bye, but I take peace in knowing my father lives on in eternal light with our Heavenly Father, the One who is the true Light of the world.